I was in California recently to meet with pastors, get together with my brothers and sisters, attend a memorial service on Saturday and preach on Sunday. A month earlier, I had a similar schedule, including a family meeting, a pastor’s meeting, a memorial service and preaching at another church.
Normally I look forward to this kind of trip, because I get to connect with many people I love. This trip was different. We had had nine people at our house for several days for Easter and a “Festivus”. Our Festivus was a time for “airing of grievances”. We had several issues that needed to be cleared up, so we scheduled our Festivus when our family came to visit for Easter.
Those days were both wonderful and emotional, but by the time I got to California, I was depleted. We had a good pastor’s meeting on Friday, but on Saturday morning, I was dressed and ready for a three hour drive to the memorial service, but I felt sick. I prayed and asked the Lord, “Should I go to this memorial service or not?”
The service was for Levi Fenn, the twenty-three year old son of Marty and Nanette Fenn. Marty had moved to Phoenix in 1985 to help us establish Living Streams. He worked with us for nine months at his own expense. Marty, Mark Dugan and Keith Kostlan established a discipleship house that was a fruitful ministry for many people for years.
I knew Marty’s heart was broken. I wanted to be there for him. Yet, when I prayed, I got no answer from the Lord.
This concerned me because I had just been studying I Samuel 14. In this Old Testament chapter, the priest asks the Lord if the Israelites should pursue the Philistines who were fleeing a battle in defeat. When the Lord didn’t answer their prayer, King Saul realized the problem was someone’s sin. King Saul had lots cast and the sin was revealed.
I prayed again, wondering, “Lord, why aren’t you answering me?”
I received an unexpected response, “I already answered you.”
I thought back to a conversation the day before. When I had started to feel sick, I called Kristina in Phoenix. I knew she would understand my dilemma. I told her how I felt and how much I wanted to go to the memorial service. Her reply was clear, “Don’t go to the memorial service. You need to rest.”
Kristina is filled with the Holy Spirit and she loves me. Yet it is still hard to have the Lord speak through her when her counsel challenges what I want to do.
Sometimes when I don’t get the answer I’m hoping for, I keep pushing and probing to get what I want. On this occasion, I wasn’t happy about the decision, but I surrendered.
I then remembered the memorial service was going to be livestreamed from the church. I started scrolling through my Facebook Messenger account to find the livestream information which had been sent to me. As I looked through my old messages, I came across one from Courtney, which had been sent to me six weeks earlier. I rarely use my Messenger account and had missed it when it arrived.
I’ll summarize Courtney’s message. “This is awkward, but I’ve been looking for my dad’s family. I recently found out that he was born a Buckley in Marin County in 1963 and then put up for adoption. I was looking through Facebook for Buckleys in Marin and came across your picture. You look a lot like my dad, so I thought I would reach out to you.”
I immediately responded to Courtney and sent her my phone number. We talked on the phone when she responded. She told me that her dad had been trying to find his natural family for years, but he had been thwarted by deception. He had been told his adoptive family had no information about his birth family.
I knew I had a brother born in 1963 who I had never met. As we talked, pieces of our family jigsaw puzzle started to fall into place for both of us.
I don’t know if I would have ever connected with Courtney if I had not been looking for the livestream connection. When I had not responded to her message for over a month, she assumed I didn’t want anything to do with her or her dad. I hope to tell you the next chapter of this story in a coming Reflections.
That afternoon, I watched the memorial service for Levi livestreamed from Grace Community Church in Auburn. It was powerful to listen as Marty and Nanette and their children talked about the son and brother they loved with all their hearts. They had prayed for him and played with him all his life.
They told the truth about Levi’s love for God and his struggle to stay free from a highly addictive drug. Levi had not wanted to die, he only wanted to get high. One extra drop of fentanyl is all it takes to snuff out a life, whether someone loves God or not.
I John 5:6 says, “The Spirit is the truth.” If we want the Spirit to move in our lives, in our churches, and in our nation, we must tell the truth, regardless of the cost. The Holy Spirit is the Spirit of truth. The Word of God is truth. Jesus is the truth and we too must be people of truth.
Deception comes to us from foreign adversaries because they want to divide us. Deception comes from Hollywood because it makes sin seem exciting. Deception enters politics because people crave power. Deception negatively effects medical care, business and relationships. Satan is the father of lies. When we lie, we allow Satan to work through us. The penalty for deceiving others is that we reap what we sow and get deceived ourselves.
Jesus came to destroy the works of Satan. Even though this is a painful journey for all of us at times, if you follow Jesus with all your heart, you too will overcome the evil one and reign with Christ.
May the Spirit of truth set you free from all deception and empower you to love others effectively.